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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27154552">In the name of something new</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieTheMouse/pseuds/AnnieTheMouse'>AnnieTheMouse</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>le déserteur [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Old Guard (Movie 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Book of Nile, F/F, F/M, Love Changes Everything, M/M, Post-Exile, okay perhaps not, unintentional rhyming tags ftw</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:08:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,469</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27154552</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnieTheMouse/pseuds/AnnieTheMouse</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Booker's made it to the other side of exile. He's learned a lot, he's grown a lot, and for the first time in his immortal years, he's actually lived a lot. It doesn't make it perfect. It doesn't fix everything. But at the end of it all, they're family. And he may be broken, but he still loves them.</p><p>He thinks things may even be getting back to normal - except the words Andy said on his return will not leave his mind.<br/>(Path 2)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Andy | Andromache of Scythia/Quynh | Noriko, Booker | Sebastien le Livre/Nile Freeman, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>le déserteur [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944298</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>133</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I believe there are two ways the story can go after the first one, and I don’t want to negate one with the other, but this couldn't be unseen.  I also don’t want to negate the fact that Booker did what he did in the first story with no thought of anything coming out of it, because he wanted to spare someone else his pain. Not because he saw Nile in a particular light. But I think he could come to. </p><p>If you're here just because Book of Nile, this is a direct sequel to the first story in this series (That would be enough) - story 2 is skippable, and honestly you could probably just read this one without the first story but you'd miss a few references.</p><p>If this pairing isn't your thing, enjoy Path 1 in the last story and you can pretend this path doesn't exist ;)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The thing is, if Andy hadn’t said it, he wouldn’t have thought it.  He’d gotten used to the idea of being alone.</p><p>Well, not truly alone. He had his family again, and their love, and that would be enough, he had promised himself.</p><p>But every once and awhile, he’d see Andy and Quyhn and he’d hear Andy’s voice telling him he just had to be more patient.  To wait. That eventually he would be gifted with someone to share it all with. Like her. Like the others.  That someday he can have someone, perhaps even someone who will understand that he still will always love the family time left behind.  </p><p>Perhaps even someone who would be able to love him still, with his heart so divided.</p><p>He tells Nile what she said once, a day when he’s seen her roll her eyes a little too painfully at the latest edition of the Joe and Nicky show, a little too much hurt vs. sarcasm in her face as she does. He’s come to appreciate the freeness with which they share their love, the fact that they can have this.  But it had taken much to get him there (too much given the betrayal baked into it) and it had definitely been longer than Nile had been alive.  </p><p>Even if Nile has now been alive nearly a century.</p><p>She hums at that, considering.  “Didn’t think Andy was that much of a romantic, to believe in that kind of fate.”</p><p>He grins, unable to help himself, reminded of another conversation on destiny, before his self-destructive plan had got awry and his family had paid the price. “Maybe it’s more like misery loves company?”  The laugh he sparks from her, her earlier annoyance and sadness fading, is a definite job well done. </p><p>It’s not that he’d promised anyone but himself to keep Nile from falling into the same hole he did, but it feels worthwhile none the less.  Especially when she thanks him, later.  “Not what I’d expect from Andy, but it’s good to know even she believes in things sometimes.” The sincerity of her voice is enough to give him chills, before she ruins it by kicking at him.  “Other than her axe, at least.”</p><p>“And me” chimes out Quyhn as she appears in the doorway where she hadn’t been barely a moment ago.</p><p>“Well of course you” Nile responds with a shocked laugh. </p><p> Booker’s long over flinching whenever Quyhn sneaks up on him.  She’d given him a few decades to recover before giving him a hard time, on account of the number of times she’d killed him.  He’d long forgiven her for that, long before he’d even weaned the jumpiness out of himself. He recognized despair well enough, his old companion, even when it was turned outward instead of inward.</p><p>Despair is only a lurking presence in his life nowadays, noticeable in the background but no longer in control.  His bad days are few and far between, and on those bad days he sits with Quyhn now. No one can understand the feeling of being trapped better than her.</p><p>It’s a lot easier with his ghosts having had years to find rest. With his family here, and safe - safe by his own making, his admitted obsession to have them never be in a situation like he’d caused them to be again.</p><p>And with the hope Andy had somehow sewn into his chest with a few careful words in a graveyard long ago.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Title stolen yet again for Booker's musical soulmate, Leonard Cohen - Coming Back to You. I can't pick just one lyric, it's so perfect in general for this, so here, have my favourite cover of the song - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwogNht1k2U</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s a lot easier to remember dates now that your calendar electronically follows you wherever you go.  A lot more dangerous too, but that’s a problem for another day.</p><p>Today it’s Nile centennial. And although his memory of her birth into immortality is tied up in complex self recrimination - he’d betrayed her too after all, even if he hadn’t known she had existed at the time of his sin - well, he cannot help but celebrate the impact Nile has had on them all. If he had brought regrets, she had brought determination.</p><p>There are gifts, of course.  Not all of Andy’s are weapons even, for once.  For dinner there are things she enjoys, things that will make her smile, however hard they are to source (he doesn’t even dare ask how Nicky had gotten his hands on that dessert).</p><p>He makes her mom’s casserole, simple and homely, just like he has before for her on special occasions.  If he was still a religious man, he’d swear he could feel Abigail Freeman smiling down on him.  The look on Nile’s face when she takes her first mouthful is just as redeeming as it’s been every time she tried it.</p><p>Her hug at the end of the night, so open and warm, is familiar, the same as it’s been ever since he’s returned to them.  “Merci, Booker.” She whispers against his cheek, a soft kiss against it again in thanks before he squeezes her and lets her turn to embrace Joe again.</p><p>He doesn’t let it hit him til he’s back, alone in his room.  She cannot know it’s the first kiss of any type he’s had in enough years he can’t even recall.  The French greeting is long gone from this world, especially for men like him.  Casual affection is not something he’s known for, and although hugs are definitely more common around the team now that they’ve learned what support is helpful, what contact is grounding, it’s somehow not quite the same.</p><p>A small kindness such as this should not rock him like this but oh it does.</p><p>His fingers linger on his cheek a moment longer, before he dismisses his foolishness and tries to put it behind him.</p><p>Because the thing is Nile and him have had a partnership in being the 3rd or 5th wheels, dependent on the day. It’s been a lot of jokes, and not bitter ones anymore, not since he’d told her Andy’s words.  It’s like those words have alleviated some of the ache, knowing that this can’t be forever, that someday they won’t have to be alone.</p><p>After all, Nile has jokingly reminded him, ”when we get our turns we need them not to give us grief too”. It’s hypothetical, and possibly a wee but hypocritical, but it’s worked.</p><p>The question of how long the waiting could be is a hard one though. Andy can’t tell them exactly how long it was that she’d lived before Quyhn. He knows Niles going through a period where she’s trying to find out enough details on both of them to date them, but he doubts she’ll have any luck.</p><p>She’s looking to the future, he knows. He should be too.</p><p>The problem is he seems to find himself looking to the side instead, ever since her party, even though it’s been a few years now.</p><p>Quyhn likes to claim Andy and her had love at first sight, but he is not sure of the truth. He knows it wasn’t that for Joe and Nicky, no matter how entwined they seem now. Their stories of murdering each other repeatedly give that away.</p><p>Still, how long he wonders, could you stand beside someone without seeing something like that?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He takes a bullet for her.</p>
<p>Well, that’s not quite accurate. He’s been taking bullets for her since his return. They all take bullets for each other when they can. It's a habit that once you've gained is hard to stop - and he admits that he'd gotten a little too into it on his return.  He wants to spare them pain, after all.  He's caused too much of it.</p>
<p>But no, to say he took a bullet for her this time would be inadequate. He takes a rocket for her.  Sees the rocket launcher fire, sees it heading her direction and doesn’t even hesitate, his body blocking its path, taking the brunt of the explosion.</p>
<p>He doesn’t remember much else until agony returns to his now half healed limbs, body struggling weakly against the arm pinning him to the ground until his head heals enough that he can hear the words being uttered that go along with it.</p>
<p>They’re in English, so even if his eyes aren’t repaired yet he knows its Nile.  The impressive chain of swears, words learned in the military but usually not uttered, makes him smile. Or try to anyway.</p>
<p>Nile sees the twitch though, and her words become more directed.  “Of all the fucking fool things to do, Booker, what were you thinking?” </p>
<p>He’s regrown enough muscle to shrug at least.  The exasperation in her sigh has him moving to sit up, as if moving can encourage his body to repair faster.   Explosions are one of the worst ways to go.  So are flames.  They all have faced both, a time or two, so she's exasperated but still patient, waiting. </p>
<p>It's only when she deems him good enough to move, washing his face with her canteen to check his eyes, that they head to follow the others where they’ve gone to save the civilians.</p>
<p>He thinks he’s recovered enough, but then they find the kid sobbing, lost from the rescued group, and Booker’s chest still aches from the blast but he carries him anyway, ignoring the other ache that grows underneath it as he tries to calm the boy as Nile takes point, more able right now to aim and protect.</p>
<p>Her son returned to the group, the mother cries over him, thanking him repeatedly as he tries to tell her its not necessary, it's fine, <em>c'est bon</em>.  But she cries still, and the boy is still sniffling, and it all adds up.</p>
<p>"You okay Booker?" Nile asks, and he can’t help the shudder that goes through him. </p>
<p>“Can I ask a favour”, he finally whispers.</p>
<p>“Anything”. Her response is so quick, so Nile.</p>
<p>“For just now, can you call me Sebastien?” His voice is barely there, but somehow she still hears him.</p>
<p>“Of course Sebastien” her answer is swift, sure - just like she is. He’s not sure which it reminds him of more. Her mother, fondly calling him Bastien as he pours her coffee, or his wife as she smiled at him from across a long ago table.</p>
<p>Both, probably.</p>
<p>But his own name from another’s lips, from her lips, knocks the sadness back enough that he can breathe, he can work with the team, until he has the chance to sit and let it out.</p>
<p>When they are back to the safe house, when they’re clean and hidden and he finally has that time, it’s not Quyhn alone this time that sits beside him, but Nile stretching out on his other side. It's better.  It's worse.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s after that point he has to admit it. Admit what had been coming from the moment she kissed his cheek.</p><p>No, he has to be honest with himself. He’s been forcing himself to be since his exile after all, no time to stop now.  It’s been a possibility from the moment she saw him, the mess that he was, the mess he had made, and refused to leave him behind. </p><p>He’s in love with her, and if that’s not the stupidest thing he’s gone and done, even possibly stupider than the Merrick incident ... well. He may not be the best at telling when he's making bad decisions, he knows that, but this sure feels like one.</p><p>His first instinct is to run. To convince everyone it’s time for one of their few years breaks, to separate and be free. Get himself time to get away, to work it out of his system somehow, to not deal with it at all for as long as possible. It would work. It’s good, or not, to know his gut instincts haven’t changed, no matter much he has.  Still always ready to desert.

</p><p>It's very, very tempting.  Booker takes a deep breath. For a minute considers that future, that choice. And then breathes out and lets it go.</p><p>He’s not sure what he’s going to do about this but he owes them too much to run. Loves them too much.</p><p>It’s funny to consider that the skills he’d used to disguise how bad his sadness was so many years ago are still ingrained in his soul, even if he’s been honest with them since he’s returned, shared with them his bad moments as well as his good.</p><p>The fact that he’s now using those old skills to hide something other than sadness this time is not something he will let himself dwell on.  </p><p>Not that there isn’t sadness still in the equation, when his brain flips that way, when the feelings overwhelm him. He hadn’t felt the urge to die quite as strongly as the moment he realized that not only did he love her, but that there was every likelihood she might not love him back.</p><p>The moment he realized that, realized the hell he could be in again ... even sitting quietly with Quyhn hadn’t taken the edge completely off that thought.</p><p>Loss and despair for something he hadn’t even had yet was a new one.</p><p>The thing is it’s not fully that he feels unworthy of her for what he did. As she’d told him once, that wasn’t hers to judge.  They've forgiven him, even if they've not forgotten, and although it's a factor it's a smaller one.</p><p>But if he's honest with himself he knows this predates that. He remembers feeling this, less strongly but the same underneath, when Jeanne had responded so favorably to his attempt at courting.  His disbelief that she would choose him.</p><p>Plus he worries, maybe, JUST maybe, that he’s starting to feel this way because she’s the one that’s available. That she’s one he’d never have to worry about dying.  Is it her he loves, or is it just the safety and the comfort that thought would bring him, the fact that this woman would be one he couldn't outlive? He’s lost too much he loved to time, and he knows what it did to him after all.</p><p>Were Andy’s words true, or are they just making him think they’re true? That’s almost scarier a thought then not being loved back. For this to be a fleeting thing, that he would risk it all on his stupid brain grasping at straws, grasping at hope.  At a type of happiness he'd given up on, traded for a family that's broken as he is and eternally at his side.</p><p>There are so many reasons, and one decision to make. It is safer, for now, to lock it away. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>oh self-doubt and self-deprecation, you old friends.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It becomes a background hum, just one other piece of Booker’s brain that is as disjointed as the rest.  He loves Nile with the love he has for his family, that is known.  He loves her with something more than that, and that is not.</p><p>He’d kept far worse secrets hidden for decades - this one, soft and almost reassuring, is one that burns less in its spot tucked up against his heart.</p><p>Nothing changes.  They find their way from one conflict to another.  They take their breaks from each other, and they come back together, and they’re working together better than they ever did before Nile, so the fact that things have changed with her is not really a stand out.  </p><p>The first time he calls her ‘boss’, she laughs at him, head ducking.  “Pretty sure she’s taller than me” she reminds him.</p><p>“Pretty sure she’s not” Joe responds, nodding alongside him as he also looks at the plan Nile has laid out, has seen what Booker saw - the care, the cleverness. “Boss”</p><p>There are enough of them to rotate now on the smaller jobs, allowing for more living between the cause.  Nile doesn’t rotate out. Booker doesn’t either.  They remain that 3rd or 5th wheel, the couples switching out as needed, and they make it work. They find their way.</p><p>Bigger jobs though - those are all hands on deck.  There are rebellions cropping up all over, the danger of increasing temperatures, decreasing available land, and as always, rich men who don’t like to share.  This one they picked based purely on the fact that it was safely far away from any recent jobs, because there are too many right now to save everyone and keeping hidden is a continually more difficult process.</p><p>Which means of course that when a new immortal arises at the hands of a corrupt government in the midst of a rebellion, it is inevitably one that happens to be on the other side of the world.  The team all gasp themselves awake from running for their life in their dreams. Just like always they make a plan. </p><p>“One of us has to go get them.” Nile says, face obviously shaken by her first experience on this side of the dreams, and none of them would disagree.</p><p>Their current plan of attack was Nile's idea, and he would never ask the others to separate from each other if there is any choice.  Besides, Booker’s their documentation expert, he’s the one that knows how to navigate this travel into - and more importantly out of  - these zones with a new companion with the right papers.  It’s only right for him to be the one that goes to get them.  </p><p>So Booker makes his way, and when he finds the face from his dreams, thankfully they don’t run. Thankfully they let him talk, an understanding caused by too many deaths on their own.  Thankfully they watch him bleed, and heal, and acknowledge the truth of what happened far better than he had. </p><p>Better than Nile too, he thinks, a long ago phone conversation playing in his head.  At least he didn’t get stabbed.</p><p>But like Sebastien at the start, they don’t want to leave.  No direct family in this case, and in this case this is the problem - those deaths have tied them to the cause too close, too strong, too much blood around them. Booker can feel the despair the deaths have left as he hears their story, a pain he is all too familiar with.  He can’t help but pitch in as much as he can, even as he works to convince their new sibling to come with them.  </p><p>Booker tells them about the faces in his dreams. About the others, who are fighting to stop something just like this, who have been fighting.  About his family, who will love them if they will let it happen.  About Nile, who he knows will hear the story and immediately start planning.</p><p>“We will come back, as soon as we can” he promises. “All of us, together.”  He knows it's the truth. He hopes they know it too.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>No I didn't just google to make sure Andy is taller. Not me.</p><p>(though she has so much presence, it could also mean that. That's definitely what my first reaction of 'crap is she?' was based off of)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Two rebellions in a row - because of course how could they not follow their latest member back to help where they needed it? - it’s helpful, it’s exhilarating, but it’s exhausting.  Immortality only heals so much.</p><p>They had been tending to forget that until Nile. Booker hopes more fresh blood will help them keep remembering.Especially as it’s easier for this new immortal to not come into a shitshow of Booker’s devising.</p><p> It’s also harder because there is nothing to distract from the realities they are now facing. He’s sure they can make it through, together.</p><p>What he’s not so sure about is what to do about the realities and realizations a new immortal has brought.  Their newcomer is funny and friendly and a genuinely good person.  Booker really likes them. But his heart hasn’t changed, even now that it’s not backed into a corner.</p><p>It was one of the few reasons left that he was holding on to.   He loves their new sibling already, their attitude, their courage - but as a sibling.  Not anything else.</p><p>He’s tried not to think that in visible age, this one is closer to Nile than he is.  In optimism, in remaining hope as well.  He’s always felt older than his age - physical age and real age both - and these first new days with a new, young spirit, have reminded him of that again.</p><p>He likes them both too much to let that possibility sour him.  Even if he knows it now exists.  It would be much better for her, in so many ways.</p><p>Well, look at that.  He already has another reason.  That helps, a little.</p><p>Their downtime, this time, is together. All of them.  At what Nile had laughing referred to one of their ‘communes’, a piece of land large enough for all of them to be together and private enough to practice.  To help teach their newcomer all the tricks of the trade that they couldn’t in the middle of the fight.  And to let them all heal up, in more ways than one.</p><p>Booker takes the time to comb through their recent history.  To make sure all the more subtle signs of their passing, of their participation in this world, are taken care of.  In the moment he can take care of the big obvious stuff, but there’s never enough time when they’re working for the detail work. </p><p>The office is small, tucked away in a back corner of the sprawl that is this house, and it’s quiet enough to let him focus.  It’s what he needs, right now.</p><p>Nile finds him there, popping up at his door unexpectedly, her casual lean against his doorframe something so familiar now that he doesn’t even think about how it eases something in his soul to have her so relaxed around him.</p><p>“It was weird, watching you through their dreams” she tells him, and Booker hadn’t thought of that.   That they would see him through the new, as he worked to convince them, to help them, to do what was needed to make his way back to his family.  “You made our case very well.”</p><p>It’s even weirder to imagine that such mundane moments would have made it through the link, instead of the fighting, the dying.  The dreams have always seemed more violent than that, more emotional than whatever plea he was making. Whatever stories he was telling.</p><p>But then, he realizes, away from them he was less on guard, and there are some emotions as strong as pain.  He’ll have to be more careful, he supposes.    Starting now, when he just hums in response, keeping his eyes on his screens, on his work.  It seems safest.</p><p>He expects her to leave.  But she doesn’t, just stands there, watching his screens with him, and he lets it lull him back into complacency.  He’s not ready for when she speaks again.</p><p>“You know what I was afraid of” she says, out of nothing, out of nowhere.  “That everything I felt for you is because you were the only one left.”  And there is no way she said those words, Booker is sure there’s no way those words could come out of her mouth, but they have, and how about that.</p><p>Nile Freeman, the most confident, assured, beautiful woman he can imagine, with a brain that tells her lies just like his.  Not just any lies, the same lies.</p><p>And he can’t have that.  Not for her.</p><p>“I have no doubt that I love you” he says, because he can't not say it, he can't let her think she's alone.  As he says it, he realizes it’s probably always been true.  Those weren’t doubts, or reasons, those were excuses. They had always been, but he’s always been a coward when it comes to things that really count.  His blood has never counted, but his heart? It’s a different story.</p><p>“Took you long enough Book” she tells him and that stupid traitor heart jumps because he still doesn't truly think she could possibly mean it but oh her hand is on his cheek, as gentle as a kiss.  The way she looks at him is both the way she’s looked at him for years but also the look he’s seen in Joe's eyes at Nicky, in Andy’s at Quyhn.</p><p>In Nile’s eyes now, as she gives the same exasperated sigh at him that she gives him when he steals the last cup of coffee, or steps in front of a rocket for her.  Sighs, and leans forward.</p><p>Her lips on his are a revelation, a miracle.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So this story &amp; the last story as I said are meant to be different paths ... but I can't say there isn't also a world where they both overlap into one world where Booker finds himself and finds love both.</p><p>So yeah. I wrote it so there's that 3rd path, the ultimate path - if you want to take it.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He doesn’t ask her how long. Booker doesn’t need to know. Doesn’t want to know.</p><p>It’s still hard enough to realize that her brain lies to her too.  Not that he believes she’s perfect - love hides faults, but he’s not that much of a fool, they’ve argued before and surely will again - but it’s still shocking to realize that she’d been sharing the same worries that he had.</p><p>“In the old days, I would have had to ask your parents for permission” he mumbles as his fingers toy with the end of one braid. His chin rests on her shoulder where they lie together.  A closeness, a touch he hasn’t even realized has been one of his deepest losses until now when he has it again.</p><p>“My mom taught you her secret family recipe” Nile tells him, and he wonders at that, for he’d never known it was that sacred.  He’d just wanted to have something to keep for her, for motives that he could never have told Madame Freeman, and he wonders what it was that had made Madame Freeman trust him with that.  Perhaps the fact that he was alone, perhaps the fact that she was.  He'll never know.</p><p>He doesn't know much,  most days, but he knows he's lucky right now.  Especially as she twists in his arms to look at him, straight in the eye.  "If she’d trust you that much, I’m pretty sure you would have had it Bastien”.  His name rolls off Nile’s tongue, and there’s nothing french about how she says it, and it’s nowhere near to how it was spoken so many centuries ago, like his wife would have said it. But it’s still the best thing he’s ever heard.</p><p>It's too small, the heart in his chest. Just like it’s too small, this bed in her room.  It’s all too close, it’s too much, but he will not run from this. He will not run from her. Probably more importantly, he won't run from himself.  Surprisingly enough, he realizes Andy was right, and that he can have this, after all. To love again with what of his heart is left.</p><p>"Thank you" he says, and whether he's saying it to the woman in his arms, or to the ghost of another, he doesn't know, but he means it with everything that he is. Both the words, and the emotions that run through Booker as he tugs her up for another kiss.  Everything.</p><p>And that, he realizes, is enough.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Epilogues are made to be sappy, is my opinion.</p><p>This is the end of the stories I have currently in my brain for this series. No guarantees there might not be an idea later, but right now this is what I got. I hope you enjoyed, no matter which path you took.  Thank you all for your extra kind kudos and comments.</p>
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